Tina Marie Drake Gibbons

When I Am Alone

I cry when I am alone, when I don't think I can stand another moment. With others near, I am a warrior behind a wall of stone; unbreakable, brave, positive, resilient: everything I want them to see. But, I cry sometimes when I am alone. My fortress crashes, pebbles at my feet.
Pain, frustration, defeat; my misery leaks, overflows, follows cracks eroded by previous tears.

Emotions purged and thoughts collected, I gather the rocks and rebuild the wall. A smile my shield, I carry on.

©️ MARIE DRAKE January 27, 2022

Have You Felt the Loss of Love?

If love could've kept you here, you'd still be with me. I want to be together again, I miss you more each day.
'Don't rush to follow,' you'd tell me, 'there are so many reasons for you to stay.
Shower our loved ones with your presence and cement their memories. I'm watching over everyone and sending my love through you. Soon enough you'll join me, Love. Forever beside me, when you do.'
©️ Marie Drake January 2022

Do What Brings You Joy

If this year has showed me anything, it's that none of us are promised tomorrow. Nobody knows what will happen the next day, week, or month. In the last six months, besides my health diagnoseses, my mother was diagnosed with Stage 3 Ovarian Cancer, my sister was diagnosed with Thyroid cancer, and we lost our nephew to an overdose. Therefore, I didn't listen to the naysayers about it being too early to decorate for Christmas. I went into full-blown holiday mode November 1st. 🎅🤶 We will be hosting several smaller gatherings in our home instead of one large one, still mindful of COVID. But, the intrinsic joy of the season is what I need, so I won't let anyone begrudge or delay my celebration.

Drama, Lies, and Battle Cries

Decades later, here you are, your victim costume tattered and worn. You squeeze and tug and hold it together even though it fits too snug and the material is frayed. Elevate yourself, scream and shout at anyone who will listen. Words of woe about those who didn't ingest your venom with gratitude, accept your abuse or give as much as YOU thought they should. Lay blame of your circumstances at others' feet, spit poison in their faces and try to recruit others in your hate campaign. Wake up call. I've been in your shoes but rejected the uniform. The world didn't owe you anything. It never promised to be fair. Not even family members OWED you anything. Your life. Your choices. You spent your decisions poorly and sprayed your noxious attitude over your children. When you have taught your children that family doesn't love them and has never done anything for them, YOU have failed. Children are your greatest gift and YOUR highest priority. If not a single other person on this planet reaches a hand to help, you claw and you climb and you carry them on your back. You pull them tighter into your embrace and love them enough for a thousand people. Put on your suit of armor and deny the victim's ensemble. Hold your children's emotional well being above your pride, jealousy, or disappointment. If you want someone to have a relationship with your child and you think that relationship will be beneficial NOT harmful to their development then keep your mouth shut. Sealed. Stem the flow of bitterness and hostility. Speak ill of no one, or speak of them not at all. Honestly, even if you don't support a relationship between them. Either way, in seeking sympathy and coconspirators for your perceived wrongs, you damage yourself and your children more than anyone you point your finger at. You sew the threads of a matching victim's suit those children will easily slip into when they find excuses are necessary and readily available.

October 2021

Falling In Love All Over Again

That song comes on the radio.

Back in time, our minds go.

First spark, first date, first dance;

A smile, a touch, a glance;

A breath, a whisper, a kiss;

A step, a spin, a dip; our hearts aflutter;

Falling in love all over again.